God Bless and Pay For You
Every time I see a certain patriotic phrase peppered commercially on a
personal vehicle or perched atop a $2.99 7-11 sign, I just have to misread
it on purpose. I keep thinking that I too, should hop on the proverbial
bandwagon and print my own version of these proclamations. I want it to
First of all, I'm not sure if anyone would notice the slight letter
alteration. I mean, like all good platitudes, the more you see it, the more
you don't. Which is quite ironic … and in my case, may be quite saving.
For this brings up my second point. I'm really curious about people's
reaction. Of course, everyone would claim I'm a cynic and unpatriotic.
However, nothing could be further from the truth. I didn't want any harm to
our troops or any other country's troops … I just wanted Providence's
blessing in other, more immediate, ways.
Let's face it, a blessing of regularity is far more beneficial than
the frivolous gesundheit that accompanies a sneeze. So maybe we
should offer up a little wish and a prayer before we retire to the
bathroom… I have an uncle who certainly does every time he has to pee.
No, he's approaching 80, and if it was an STD, it probably would have
killed him years ago. But I'm getting off topic.
The problem with a sign of this nature, is a sign is a pronouncement that
goes one-way. The only response from this message on my bumper would be a
honk. And then I would wonder if the person was honking in agreement,
disagreement, or over the fact that I cut him off on the freeway.
So I am doing what all of my colleagues would do … I put it on my
website, attach a little bit of dynamic web wizardry and allow random
people to post comments. Not that anyone really does … but at least you
all know that I meant well.
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