One day, while working in my office, I got an instant message … I
thought it was from my wife, but it actually was from my 5 year old daughter,
who confiscated her computer.
While I've been wanting her to practice reading and writing, I might as well
teach her the finer points of being a teen-ager while I am at it. She was so
excited at being able to read and write, that I every morning this week, I
would get a new message from her.
| Flora: |
hlow
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| Flora: |
it;s me flora
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| Daddy: |
Hi Flora. How was school?
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| Flora: |
goo the is r las day in shin
(Good. This is our last day in China … You see, her kindergarten class was pretending to visit China this week)
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| Flora: |
i am gowing to swemklas at konsog at tooday ad frsday
(I am going to swim class at Connestoga today and Friday)
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| Daddy: |
That's great!
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| Flora: |
yes
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| Daddy: |
That will be fun.
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| Flora: |
piay wis you
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| Daddy: |
OK
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| Daddy: |
What will we play?
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| Flora: |
kad gams
(Kid games)
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| Flora: |
das funn
(That's funny … In response to a picture I sent her)
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| Daddy: |
Very funny.
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| Flora: |
in may charile wiw be in konsdog
(In May, Charlie will be in Connestoga … for swimming classes)
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| Daddy: |
Is he playing Cogs?††Cogs is what we call Disney's online game, ToonTown, which my 3 year old is addicted to
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| Flora: |
no he wos me to piay wis me
(No, He wants to play with me)
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| Flora: |
naw he is piay cogs
(Now, he is playing Cogs)
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| Flora: |
goobiy
(Good-bye)
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| Flora: |
he is wot to to to you
(He wants to talk to you … That is, Charlie wants to talk)
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| Charlie: |
aaisolk.alz.a,ln.wnx.qwikz,qke,,qmq,qjwkoqiiqajkqai
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| Charlie: |
mdk,amjdksnjrfkldnwskldhqakdchjelfjmsxdldj
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| Charlie: |
lf;edledp[fkld;lpfdlfdkledokledskldckl,sap[qA
(I can't translate that)
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| Flora: |
hi…it's me FLORA
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| Flora: |
hlow daddy
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| Flora: |
say supeg
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| Flora: |
i love you daddy
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| Flora: |
i did not gow to sgoowo to day
(I did not go to school today … on account that she is sick)
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| Flora: |
hi..it's Flora
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| Daddy: |
Hi Flora! Sorry, I was not here.
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| Daddy: |
How are you?
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| Flora: |
good
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| Flora: |
i took medsid it ws wos
(I took medicine, it was … uhm … worse? I dunno that one)
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| Flora: |
say syupeg
(Say something.)
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| Daddy: |
Are you going to your club?
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| Flora: |
tooday its my club
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| Daddy: |
I have to meet with some men. I will talk to you soon.
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| Flora: |
i love you daddy
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| Flora: |
haw di you git to wrc sofast
(How did you get to work so fast … I don't know why she asked this)
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| Flora: |
mom is goweg to tip supeg to you
(Mom is going to type something to you)
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| Flora: |
hlow daddy
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| Daddy: |
Hi Flora. How are you feeling today?
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| Flora: |
bedr (Better)
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| Daddy: |
That is good!
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| Flora: |
that is good
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| Daddy: |
Yes. What are you going to do today?
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| Flora: |
i am goweg to the docd an swimeg
(I am going to the doctor and swimming)
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| Daddy: |
Your day is all full.
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| Flora: |
yes
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| Flora: |
i love you daddy
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| Daddy: |
I love you, too.
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| Flora: |
we f got to hav a prdd lasnit
(We forgot to have a party last night)
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| Flora: |
we rgoweg to cisbdonusn bt i am not gowc to hav a donut bcs i
wot a swet at the swimpoowo
(We are going to KrispyKrap Donuts but I am not going to have a donut because I got a treat at the swimming pool)
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| Daddy: |
That is good. A donut will not make you feel better.
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| Flora: |
d addy win cod sday at your wrc
(When could (I play) at your work?)
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| Daddy: |
You can come today. We can have lunch.
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| Flora: |
i can hav lunch win i am not sic
(I can have lunch when I am not sick)
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| Flora: |
say supeg
(Say something)
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| Flora: |
say supeg
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| Daddy: |
Sorry, I had to go to the bath room.
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| Flora: |
ok i wiw wat
(OK I will wait.)
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| Daddy: |
But, I am back.
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| Flora: |
hlow daddy
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| Daddy: |
Is it raining?
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| Flora: |
no
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| Flora: |
what 100 = 100
(She couldn't figure out how to make a + sign)
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| Daddy: |
You mean 100 + 100?
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| Flora: |
i dt no
(I don't know)
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| Flora: |
wud you ples asr mi cwesin
(Would you please answer my question? … However, I
thought she wanted me to ask her a question…)
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| Daddy: |
OK. Let's see … what is 12 + 3?
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| Flora: |
mi cwesnn is wt is 100 = 100
(My question is what is 100 + 100?)
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| Daddy: |
Oh! That is 200.
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| Flora: |
HODON I HAFTOP DO SUPEG
(Hold on, I have to do something)
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| Daddy: |
OK. I will be right back. I am going to go get something to eat. Bye.
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| Flora: |
BIY BIY DADDY
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| Flora: |
hlow daddy
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| Daddy: |
Hi Flora.
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| Daddy: |
How was school today?
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| Flora: |
good we are lrneg ubat rs
(Good, we are learning about Mars … Good thing she told me
about studying Venus, or I don't know if I would have guessed
what "rs" was)
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| Daddy: |
What did you learn about Mars? What color is Mars?
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| Flora: |
i do not now anseg wbawt mara.
(I do not know the answer about mars)
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| Daddy: |
Mars is red.
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| Daddy: |
Did you get a new book?
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| Flora: |
yes
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| Daddy: |
What is the book called?
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| Flora: |
i love my shaddw!
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| Daddy: |
That sounds good. Do you have a shadow?
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| Flora: |
yes
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| Daddy: |
Is it raining?
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| Flora: |
no
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| Daddy: |
Is it snowing?
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| Flora: |
no
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| Daddy: |
Is it cloudy?
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| Flora: |
no
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| Daddy: |
Is it sunny?
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| Flora: |
no
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| Daddy: |
If it is not sunny, then clouds must be over the sun … that makes it cloudy.
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| Flora: |
ow (Oh)
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| Flora: |
BIY BIY DADDY
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| Daddy: |
Bye.
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| Daddy: |
I love you, Flora.
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| Flora: |
i love you daddy
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| Flora: |
Now it's her Mamma.
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| Daddy: |
Hey, Babe …
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