Howardism: Ode to a Yellow Love Lost

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Being attached to a favorite mug is perfectly understandable… I hope she finds her way back to you.

—Melissa

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Thought I would conclude this tale of love and loss…

The mug never did return, but I found a similar mug which I purchased. However, when I returned to the office, I found a new mug that Tiphaney had purchased for me. Now I have two.

I thought this poem was humorous enough to actually send to every one in my company, and yesterday at a company meeting, I was singled out and presented with an award as the "Company Poet Laureate".

A distinguished position that I will take very seriously… really, I will.

—Howard

Ode to a Yellow Love Lost

As I sift through memories of her
I sigh, and my breath, like steam,
reminds me even more of her
As if our affair was just a dream.

Many a mindful hour was spent
Caressing, fondling and kissing
Every curve of her yellow form
Filling me with warmth. Inspiring.

But our liaison, like her presence
Was stolen and now I'm lost.
Who will graciously hold my tea
Now that my mug was ripped off?

I hope the thief who stole her,
To be inspired by her warmth,
Will kiss her with contemplation,
For she holds a lot of tea in her girth.

After my initial discovery of the disappearance of my mug at my office, I sent out a global email to my fellow co-workers to see if anyone knew of its new location…

From: Howard
Sent: Friday, June 03, 2005 9:28 AM
To: All Employees
Subject: Missing Mug…

I've misplaced my big yellow mug… she has a big belly and answers to the name Iphigenia. If you've seen 'er, please let me know. Thanks.

A co-worker thought she would respond to my odd sense of humor…

From: Tiphaney
Sent: Friday, June 03, 2005 9:34 AM
To: Howard
Subject: RE: Missing Mug…

You named your mug? You really are attached. . . . . .you know it is an inanimate object right?

But I just couldn't let that one lay unanswered…

From: Howard
Sent: Friday, June 03, 2005 9:35 AM
To: Tiphaney
Subject: RE: Missing Mug…

Not when I spend the day holding and kissing it.

Which, invariably, freaked her out…

From: Tiphaney
Sent: Friday, June 03, 2005 9:38 AM
To: Howard
Subject: RE: Missing Mug…

aaaAALLLAAAAL ALALALLLAAA LALALAAA I do not want to know anymore!! Howard you can get help. I think there is a 12 step program.

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	Ba's Lament Tea Thoughts To the Mortal Artemis Like is Stronger Than Love I Hate Poetry Three Drunks on a Florida Beach Shining Pale at Midnight What Burden? Apathy Tears for the Lost Ones Read other entries in Poetry...	Comment Being attached to a favorite mug is perfectly understandable… I hope she finds her way back to you. —Melissa Comment Thought I would conclude this tale of love and loss… The mug never did return, but I found a similar mug which I purchased. However, when I returned to the office, I found a new mug that Tiphaney had purchased for me. Now I have two. I thought this poem was humorous enough to actually send to every one in my company, and yesterday at a company meeting, I was singled out and presented with an award as the "Company Poet Laureate". A distinguished position that I will take very seriously… really, I will. —Howard Ode to a Yellow Love Lost As I sift through memories of her I sigh, and my breath, like steam, reminds me even more of her As if our affair was just a dream. Many a mindful hour was spent Caressing, fondling and kissing Every curve of her yellow form Filling me with warmth. Inspiring. But our liaison, like her presence Was stolen and now I'm lost. Who will graciously hold my tea Now that my mug was ripped off? I hope the thief who stole her, To be inspired by her warmth, Will kiss her with contemplation, For she holds a lot of tea in her girth. After my initial discovery of the disappearance of my mug at my office, I sent out a global email to my fellow co-workers to see if anyone knew of its new location… From: Howard Sent: Friday, June 03, 2005 9:28 AM To: All Employees Subject: Missing Mug… I've misplaced my big yellow mug… she has a big belly and answers to the name Iphigenia. If you've seen 'er, please let me know. Thanks. A co-worker thought she would respond to my odd sense of humor… From: Tiphaney Sent: Friday, June 03, 2005 9:34 AM To: Howard Subject: RE: Missing Mug… You named your mug? You really are attached. . . . . .you know it is an inanimate object right? But I just couldn't let that one lay unanswered… From: Howard Sent: Friday, June 03, 2005 9:35 AM To: Tiphaney Subject: RE: Missing Mug… Not when I spend the day holding and kissing it. Which, invariably, freaked her out… From: Tiphaney Sent: Friday, June 03, 2005 9:38 AM To: Howard Subject: RE: Missing Mug… aaaAALLLAAAAL ALALALLLAAA LALALAAA I do not want to know anymore!! Howard you can get help. I think there is a 12 step program. Tell others about this article:
	2014, Howard Abrams Some rights reserved	Originally written on 6 June 2005. Updated on 8 February 2014.